


The Band That Shops Together...

by GreatGawain



Series: The Adventures of Pink Floyd [12]
Category: Pink Floyd
Genre: Crack Fic, Gen, Not Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:21:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26367103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreatGawain/pseuds/GreatGawain
Summary: ...stays together? Fights together? Acts like children together? All of the above???? You never know
Series: The Adventures of Pink Floyd [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1772323
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	The Band That Shops Together...

Nick gripped the fabric tightly in his hands, knuckles fading to a ghastly white. His brow furrowed into a scowl that created tiny peaks and valleys through which the droplets of perspiration slid. His arms began to shake with the weight of the idea that this might be the most stressed he’d ever been in his life.  
There was a decision he was unwilling to make: the kind that buried its way deep into his psyche and didn’t stop ripping through him until it struck the very core of his being. The kind of decision that could literally make or break a person. A decision that could potentially cost him the dear friendships he valued so much and had cultivated lovingly over the past five years. He closed his fearful green eyes tightly, as if to shut out the choice before him. He knew what he had to do. Something like this was simply too much to handle on his own, and he found the courage to admit it to himself: he was going to have to ask for help.  
Nick wasn’t too proud to admit that it wasn’t a weakness to need the help of others from time to time; in fact, he knew that sometimes that was the best and only option. After all, what good were fair weather friends? _Better to ask forgiveness than permission, but also better to ask assistance before getting to that point in the first place, eh?_ he tried to convince himself as his eyes reopened. Self-conflict aside, the path ahead was clear. He wasn’t going to be able to get through this alone.  
He took a deep breath and squared his shoulders. _Here goes…_  
Nick turned around to face his bandmate.  
“Hey Rick.”  
“Yes sir.”  
Their eyes met, and before he could hesitate one last time, he forced the words out of his mouth and into the tense surrounding air.  
He held up the two shirts he had been clutching.

“Should I get the long-sleeved or the t-shirt?”

Richard brought a hand to his chin and stroked the stubbly hair. “Hmm… that’s a good question. I like the- wait.” He suddenly frowned. “…Nick, they’re the same fucking shirt!”  
His bandmate mirrored his expression. “Yeah I _know_ ; I really like it, I just don’t know which style would suit me more. You’re always better at this kind of shit than I am.”  
“What’s that supposed to imply?”  
“TAKE THE FUCKING COMPLIMENT!”  
“ALRIGHT, just get both then!”  
Nick blinked, then a smile spread across his face. “Yeah, you’re right! I’ll get both. That way I can wear it all year long. Thanks, Dick.”  
“Don’t call me that.”

Nick draped the two shirts over his forearm, and they left the aisle to continue walking through the enormous department store that was attached to an even more gigantic shopping mall. Richard impatiently waited for his friend to peruse the wristwatches that were on sale, and when he was finally through, they marched on – only for the keyboardist to gasp and stop dead in his tracks. Nick was admiring his soon-to-be new purchases and didn’t notice the change of pace, causing him to walk directly into him. They knocked heads and Nick stumbled back, rubbing his temple.  
“Ow, fuck, why’d you stop?”  
“Girl, _hold on_ , are those sweaters on sale?!”  
Nick groaned as the older of the pair grabbed his arm and made a beeline for the clearance rack. “It’s always the fucking sweaters…” he grumbled. “You can be such a lady sometimes. Why don’t you go have a look at the sundresses next?”  
“Everyone needs to buy clothes, Nick.” Richard’s voice was muffled from being chest-deep behind rows of hangers. “’Sides, wouldn’t be my first time in a dress anyway…”  
The box of shoes from an earlier store fell from Nick’s hands to the tiled floor with a loud _thud_. “You _WHAT?!_ ”  
Richard finally emerged from the clothing rack with a single shirt: it looked pretty similar to all the other sweaters he already owned. He turned to Nick with a huff. “I grew up with two sisters. That kind of thing tends to happen, whether you want it to or not. I’ve had my nails painted so many times I could probably open my own salon.” He held up his find and raised an eyebrow for approval. Nick, recognizing a sweater he’d seen almost daily for nearly ten years, simply rolled his eyes. “Nice. I’m glad you’re expanding your taste. Really getting outside your comfort zone.” Ever-oblivious Richard beamed. “Thanks!”

They finally exhausted what the store had to offer and made their way to the cashiers. Bags in hand, they walked out into the mall common area and scanned the perimeter for any signs of their other friends. “I forgot where they wandered off to. Didn’t Dave say something about housewares?”  
Richard shrugged, then blushed slightly. “Truthfully, I wasn’t really paying attention. When we got here, I saw a squirrel going down the walk with a whole entire apple in its mouth and it was the cutest thing…”  
Nick groaned. “Ok, can you get your head out of the clouds for _once_ and use it to help me find them? I’m getting hungry; I didn’t have lunch before we got here.”  
“You obviously weren’t looking too hard, because here they come.” Richard directed his attention to two other men making their way towards them. As they headed to greet them, though, they both sighed and exchanged a pained look with each other: even from hundreds of feet away, their body language couldn’t hide the fact that they were fighting. Again. As usual.  
They suddenly realized things were about to get interesting, though, and their dread soon turned into both of them trying not to laugh because while David and Roger were deeply engrossed in a serious argument, David was holding an ice cream cone and Roger was holding a pink balloon that bobbed up and down on its string, as if attempting to free itself from the conflict below. “Can’t wait to hear the story behind this,” Richard snickered. He attempted to compose himself as the pair stopped before them; Nick took out his identical shirts and pretended to busy himself with admiring the design on the front.

“…everything I say. I mean really, _everything?_ You know what? Never mind, we’ll settle this later. Hullo Nick. Rick,” David greeted with no enthusiasm for someone carrying an ice cream. “Collect a good haul?”  
“Not bad, if I say so myself, but uh, Rog, what are you doing with that balloon? Are you 12?”  
Roger narrowed his eyes. “You don’t need to be a _child_ to enjoy the little things in life, Nick.” He glanced down at the clothes on his friend’s arm and scoffed. “Nice butterflies. …Did you get two of the same shirt? Who fucking does that?”  
It was Nick’s turn to scowl back. “I LIKED IT, alright?! Christ. It was a difficult decision, so I just got both of them. Go play with your balloon or something.” Without responding, Roger pulled said object down out of the air to eye level between them, then punched it swiftly so that it bounced forward and ricocheted off Nick’s face. Nick stared blankly back at his laughing friend but said nothing in response. What a child.

Richard cleared his throat. “Hi Dave, I don’t suppose _you_ stole that from an infant?” he questioned, eyeing the dessert that was dangerously close to melting.  
David grinned slightly. “No, I just felt like something sweet. Especially after being around so much bitterness all afternoon…” He nodded towards Roger, who seemed to miss the remark. “Remind me to tag along with you next time, because I’m about at my wit’s end with him. Can’t go more than five fucking minutes without talking about his _bloody concept albums_.”  
“I heard that!”  
“GOOD!”  
“Fine! I like Nick more than you anyway!” To emphasize his point, Roger grabbed the friend he had just hit in the face with a balloon and brough his arm around his shoulders. “We don’t need him, do we?”  
“But I like Dave.”  
“…Ok but I’m better though, right?”  
Nick groaned. “Can we just get tea already? I’m famished.” He had a feeling this could go on for hours and before long, he’d have wasted away to nothing.

“Shall we go to the pub, then?” Roger offered. He flicked a shiny coin into the air and caught it mid-flip. “Netted myself a nice sum from winning a bet against Peter.”  
“Right, the last thing we need is another drunk band argument…” Richard muttered.  
“What was that?”  
“Nothing.”  
“I’m in,” David spoke up. He gave Roger a look. “That is… if I’m _invited._ ” Roger stuck out his tongue. David flicked him off. Roger raised a fist. Nick smacked both of them upside the head.  
“Come on. Let’s get the hell out of here.”

As they made their way out of the crowds, Roger tried to steal David’s ice cream while David attempted to pop Roger’s balloon all the way to the car.

**Author's Note:**

> Hm I'll admit not my best, kind of messy but that's my fault for trying to combine two separate story plans. Probably the tamest crack fic I've ever written lmao~  
> As requested from Tumblr: "Nick and Rick clothes shopping" but I had to get the others involved too  
> I wasn't going to initially make this a crack fic but I couldn't resist my favorite style


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